Lil' ol me got a blog award! I totally don't deserve one because I am a complete blog slacker, Ashleigh just loves me :) lol Thank you so much to one of my fav birth mommas!! Go and read her blog its awesome and....she actually updates it! :))) and I know you're jealous I got to meet her and give her a hug :)
Here are my picks for the Cherry on Top Award!
I really need to update this and I promise I will. We will be on vacation soon and I will have some time to do it. My absence stated with vacation I think and then the summer and I was just enjoying life and honestlly, I'm not really a blogger! There I admitted it, I was a good faker for a while but I'm not. I will go back and do my best to try and be a good blogger lol. I adore people who can write well, I soooo wish it was me :)
Basically we have been trying to network in hopes of adopting and still no luck yet. The tide may be changing, I am getting a feeling. Who knows we'll see. I will be back and I will back up and fill you in onour summer months and more, even Sammy sweetpea's 3rd Birthday!! What a big boy now!!!
Ok, adios for now.
My good friend Michelle is a guest blogger on Birthmothers 4 Adoption. Please read her beautifully written words!! Love u girl :)
I have been thinking about this for a few weeks. I have been reading alot of things that upset me. Although I love getting other perspectives on things, this particular opinion hurts my heart. I have been reading lots of posts on other blogs and have also been reading the responses. Alot of what is being said is basically that adoptive parents are baby snatchers. Open adoption is a lie and we have coerced young, unexpectedly pregnant women into giving their babies to us. Well as I pondered this and thought if this was true in "my case" I came up with this.
~We were introduced to Sam's birthmom by HER Uncle, they had no idea what we looked like, there was no shiny profile, no "oh hey, look at us we're perfect". It was just a plain and simple, she was pregnant and wanted to make an adoption plan, a decision that had nothing to do with us.
~Next was when we met, we talked and answered questions for 6 hrs. with the birthparents and their moms. We didn't hold a gun to their head and say pick us, but they still did because they believed we would be good parents for their little boy.
~Moving on through the next 3 months, we got to know each other better and told each other our fears and concerns and how we would ALL like everything to be. We took their lead on everything, never forced them to do anything.
~Now for the day our son came into this world. We did not go to the hospital as per their request. We waited to hear the news with a phone call. We waited and waited....we thought he was to be born around noon and we hadn't heard anything all day. Finally at about 7:30pm we couldn't take not knowing if B was ok if Sam was ok and we texted M's mom (B is birthmom & M is birthdad) and asked how they were? She called back and said you have a son!! We got all the details and then waited to her from B's mom. Well we didn't get that phone call til the morning. Now for anyone that has done adoption before knows this waiting is extremely hard. Yes, we did hear from M's mom but needed to hear we would still be parents from B's mom and those 13 hrs were very long. My point of this being we NEVER called and harrassed them to find out, we waited and prayed til they called on their own to tell us to come to Philly.
~So, now we are in Philly in front of the hospital and we call to say we are there and B's mom tells us that B isn't up to seeing us right now. Well honestly we thought we were experiencing another failed adoption :( We turned the car around and were headed to my aunts. We did not storm the hospital and say "hell no we won't go" and demand to see "our" baby. After all it was her baby and she had every right to see who she wanted too and when she was ready. As we were on our way, we got another phone call saying, "ok, you can come but, she wants to hold the baby while you're here" to which we said "of course". We went and saw him and B asked if I wanted to hold Sam and I said "no" its ok, you hold him. She said no, I really want you to. So... I did and it took everything I had not to kiss and snuggle him and cry when I did. I did not want to make her upset or uncomfortable, she was allowing me to hold him. when she clearly didn't want to at first and I wanted to respect that. We stayed about an hour and left, so she could have that precious time with him.
~Now for discharge at the hospital. We were to wait alllll dayyyy til B went home before we could go to the hospital to get Sam. She didn't want to see us leave with Sam. I totally get that. And we respected that and did as they asked. As we left the hospital I called B's mom to tell her we did have him and that all was ok.
~ Fast forward the week and we get a text from B asking if she could see him again before we go back to NY. Well again, we thought because she didn't want us to hold him or see us leave with him, she had changed her mind and was going to tell us she wanted him back. They had signed the papers the day before, but they had 45 days after that to change their mind. And even though we thought that we said ok, and went over their house the next night. We didn't just skip town and say heyyy if you want him back come to NY, we did what was right for Sam, for B and for us.Well she just wanted to see him and love him and take pictures and it was the best thing we ever did. That one night with their family made us all a real family.
~ Present day...us trying to adopt again. We have had 3 emotional scammers since we have been trying, my thoughts on this are too much to get into right now but I think we have had them because we are so open. We believe in open adoption. I know there are alot of PAP's that promise it and don't want it but, we do. And I think this is why I am able to be sucked in by these emotionally needy women. I also think that I have let it go to far because I DO NOT want to be coercive. I give info so they can talk to other women considering adoption as well as other woman who have. I never push them to make a decision, in fact I tell them they should take their time. I actually just take the time to get to know each other. Well unfortunately this gets taken advantage of. And now although I really want to be very open and give as much space as needed, I am a little more guarded with my time and my emotions. Any way I digress.
It started when we went away and then since we have gotten back we have been in summer mode. Not in the mood to write too much. I will update this coming week, including some new pics. Nighty night! xoxo
To the best Daddy in the world!!! I love you more each day because I love the way you love Sammy! I love seeing your face when you look at him. I love when you say I love you boomba to him. I love when you give him tons of smookies! I love when you fall asleep together, melts my heart. I love how you always want to be home to hang out with him. I love when you look at me with that smile because he said something cute and you know I'm thinking the same thing. I love that you send B pics of him even when I am not there. I love when you read him his books. I love when I hear the two of you laughing and I am in the other room. I love that you love being a daddy!!!! I love you!!! Thank you for making my dreams come true, you're a wonderful husband and an amazing Daddy!! I can't wait for our next lil' one to meet their Daddy and I can't wait to see your face when that happens. Happy Father's Day my love xoxoxo
I am having a hard time right now waiting for our little one to find their way to us. It's been a long road and I am feeling a little discouraged. I believe it will happen in God's time and I know this to be true because we have Sam as living proof! BUT...... it's hard when your heart aches for the baby that you want so badly. Thank God for Sam and his sweet smile and hugs. He makes the waiting tolerable. He also reminds me of what a blessing we receive when a mom picks us to love her baby forever and for that I am grateful. I know the wait is meant to be, I know we have to be in the right place at the right time for the special mom and baby to find us. Thank you to my incredible hubs and my family and great friends that put up with my craziness while we wait for God's timing to be right! I saw this quote on This is a Site for Birthmothers by Birthmothers and like they say, its all in the timing, it's exactly what I need right now!!!
“Life is all about timing... the unreachable becomes reachable, the unavailable become available, the unattainable... attainable. Have the patience, wait it out It's all about timing.”
This is me trying to be patient! :) because...this is the blessing we got with patience and timing before, SAM!!!
Before I was a Mom, I never tripped over toys or forgot words to a lullaby. I didn't worry whether or not my plants were poisonous. I never thought about immunizations.
Before I was a Mom, I had never been puked on. Pooped on. Chewed on. Peed on. I had complete control of my mind and my thoughts. I slept all night.
Before I was a Mom, I never held down a screaming child so doctors could do tests. Or give shots. I never looked into teary eyes and cried. I never got gloriously happy over a simple grin. I never sat up late hours at night watching a baby sleep.
Before I was a Mom, I never held a sleeping baby just because I didn't want to put her down. I never felt my heart break into a million pieces when I couldn't stop the hurt. I never knew that something so small could affect my life so much. I never knew that I could love someone so much... I never knew I would love being a Mom.
Before I was a Mom, I didn't know the feeling of having my heart outside my body.. I didn't know how special it could feel to feed a hungry baby. I didn't know that bond between a mother and her child. I didn't know that something so small could make me feel so important and happy.
Before I was a Mom, I had never gotten up in the middle of the night every 10 minutes to make sure all was okay. I had never known the warmth, the joy, the love, the heartache, the wonderment or the satisfaction of being a Mom. I didn't know I was capable of feeling so much, before I was a Mom ...
To our dear B, We love you more than words can say! You are part of our hearts forever, and we are so blessed to have you in our lives!! Thank you from the bottom of our hearts for choosing us to be Sam's parents. We love him, and you more than anything in the world. Love always, Meghan, Kenny & Sam
We have had a fun filled week. We had a blast at Chucky Cheese. Sam got lots of tickets and then all he wanted with them was candy. He loves playing basketball and loved playing fireman on the cool game they had with a hose and all. We also met a really nice couple who was in NY because they just adopted a baby. They were waiting for ICPC to clear to go back to Missouri. The baby was very sweet and they were so happy. Boy, was I a little baby envious. The nice way of saying jealous, lol!!! :) The rest of the week was filled with playing outside, planting flowers, Sam even helped with that. He is also now watering them too. And finally the big day, we were off to Philly to see B off to her Prom. She looked absolutely beautiful!!!! We are soooo lucky she asked us to come. We had an amazing time, watching her get ready and then the tons of pics when her date arrived. Then we were off to the school to see all the kids leave. We we got there it was so cute, Sam saw B and was screaming her name from across the parking lot! He was so excited to see her. After that we headed back to her mom's house and hung out with family. It was really cool, her brother and sister's were there along with lots of cousins, aunts and uncles. A few of her mom's friends as well. What was really nice some of them hadn't met Sam yet so thats was extra special. Sam gets being a rockstar from his birth grandma!! Sam was choking on a french fry and she turned him upside down and got it out!!! Can you say OMG! I loved this woman before now even more so. She saved my son from choking. I was soooo scared, we were both crying. Well the night was great all around and we can't wait to see everyone again. I got some really sweet pictures of Sam and B! One in particular made me cry. I go upstairs when she was getting ready and I go in the room and see Sam helping her put on her shoes. It was too sweet for words. Hmmm... what else? Well we have been having some major water gun fights! We got supersoakers for Sam and boyyyyy is he loving them. Two days in a row we were soaked. Yesterday when Kenny got home from work Sam and I ganged up and got him!! I am guessing it was a welcome surprise since he worked a bike race all day in the heat and sun. Speaking of that, his head got really sunburned. OUch!! This is our new news for the week. See ya soon! :)
Our son is awesome! He zipped up his jacket all by himself! He did it for the first time yesterday and did it again today. So now he knows how to get dressed, put socks on and.....zip his own jacket at 2 1/2 yrs old!! And lord knows we can't help him, he wants to do it alllll by himself! That's all for now, just had to brag about our sweetpea. :)
I know I have been a slacker and have not updated, so here it goes our past week. We had our visit to Baltimore with B and it was great. We had awesome weather and the lacrosse games were good. Sam loved it. Kenny, B and I had some really deep conversations and all I can say is we are so blessed and lucky to have her in our lives. The fact that we can talk about the stuff we do is awesome. Obviously I am not going to go into detail about what we talked about but, I know it is special to have such an open and honest relationship with our child's birth mom. Well the next day we went to Annapolis and Sam, B and I walked around town petting dogs and having ice cream while Kenny took a tour of the Naval Academy. We are definitely going to go back, its a cute town that we need to explore more. We drove back to Philly and went to B's moms house and hung out and had dinner with the family. We have the best time with them. I have been saving the best for last of the weekend. B asked us if we wanted to go and see her off to prom!! OF COURSE we do!!! We can't wait. It's actually this Friday coming up, so we are taking a drive and going to see how beautiful she looks and take a million pictures. I will definitely have to bring tissues! The rest of the week has been pretty normal and not much going on. We've had beautiful weather so we have spent alot of time outside and at the park. Our yard is shaping up and we are ready for flowers, which I got yesterday. Then we had Joe and Catalina & the kids over for a bbq. We all had a great time but the kids had a blast. Their son Joseph is 6 and their daughter Francesca is almost 2. They all ran around for hours laughing,playing, fighting, getting hurt, getting dirty, laughing and then passing out because they were exhausted!! I have the pics to prove it. Today we took it easy and went to breakfast and then cleaned a little and after Sam's nap we went to Grandma and Poppa's for a visit. The visit includes the fire house. My dad is a volunteer fireman and Sam LOVES going to the firehouse and driving the truck and putting the gear on!! Soooo cute, everything WOW!! to him when he's there. Next it was Chinese and mom and dads and now I'm here. As always I will leave you with a few pics. Francesca, Sam, Joseph Sam washing the car! B saying goodnight to Sam B's brother putting on Sam's shoes Birth grandma giving hugs B and Sam at the game B, Sam and her sister playing in the tent! Meghan and Sam Kenny and Sam
Quotes I loved and borrowed from the Birth Mom Buds FB page
"I am too positive to be doubtful, too optimistic to be fearful, and too determined to be defeated."
" The size of your success is measured by the strength of your desire; the size of your dream; and how you handle disappointment along the way"
An amazing blog, by an amazing birthmom and friend!
A mother's love is patient and forgiving when all others are forsaking, it never fails or falters, even though the heart is breaking ~ Helen Rice
If you need a birth mother basket or would like to donate!
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The special meanings of the songs we picked!
"I knew I loved you before I met you" :
This happens to be our wedding song, but also has a new meaning since we have been blessed with Sam. We loved him wayyyy before we ever met him.
Sometimes we didn't understand the broken road, from infertility to the wait to adopt, until we held Sam in our arms. It led us to him and now we are on that road again. We cant wait to see how God blesses this broken road!
This song just makes us think of some of the wishes we have for the birth mom in our life, will be in our lives and all that have touched our lives. We are better people for knowing and loving you. Thank you! ♥ M,K,&S
I cry everytime I hear this, thinking of Sam's birthmom.
Kenny's fav movie. We watched it on our second date and he knew every line. :)
"All I want for Christmas":
While I know she is talking about a man in the song, I can't help but tear up and think about wanting a baby by Christmas. I did before Sam and now I did it this year too. And ya know...they play the song all the time during Christmas!
Talk about tears! This song is dedicated to Sam's birth mom and our future child/childrens birthmom, and to all birth moms who are brave and amazing to us. We love you! ♥